msdubstep: (eric 3)
Hey so...what's up?

I haven't done a life update in while so I'll just cut to the chase.

About 3 weeks ago, my great grandma died. She was 97 and had a great life. She was one of the sweetest people I've ever known. Over the last 3 years or so, her mind and health declined and she'd gotten so ill that my great uncle and aunt took her from the assisted living facility she was staying at and in to their home, and about 2 weeks later, she passed on. I regret having not gotten to see her more before she died. But even not knowing who any of us were and in pain, she was still in good spirits on the very last day I saw her alive. I'll miss her so much. She was there for me through good and bad times and was a rock for our family.

I've been working less hours this past couple of weeks. I'm still having trouble on the register and my boss wants to give more hours to people who can take orders, so most days when I am working, I'm out in the dining room cleaning and stocking. I have really been trying to get better but according to my boss, I haven't been and I'm really trying to stay positive and not get discouraged but it's hard. I've been thinking about getting a new job and moving on. I've working there for 3 years, and I've had a great run but I need a bit more, y'know?

My depression has also been taking its toll, and my interest in things I used to like to do has waned considerably. I used to write fanfic but unless it's for a challenge on NCIS verse, I don't write at all anymore. And my participation in that community has really gone down. As a mod, I'm sort of...I guess ashamed that I haven't been leading up to standard. I still want to stay with the community and I'm still in the fandom, I guess. I haven't even been watching the original series as much after Ziva left. The show really hasn't been the same without her.

And I retook the GED math and failed again. :( I have to take it all over again since they're going to be changing it to all computer stuff after the first of the year. I'm not looking forward to that but with my hours getting cut, at least I've got more time and energy to study.

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, I know I did. Family came over and we ate a lot of good food and played Uno, which has become sort of a tradition in the house. My roommate and friend AJ lets out this hilarious side of her when we all get together and play so that makes it even more fun.

Sorry most of this post was sort of sad. As things get better, which I know they will, I'll be sure to post those things as well. Night, everyone.
msdubstep: (densi)
The room was eerily quiet.

Deeks looked at Kensi, his eyes full of hope. He was down on one knee, holding up a velvet box with a beautiful engagement ring nestled inside it, and he’d popped the question to her. Kensi had widened her eyes and her hands had flown to her mouth in shock, but now she was almost motionless except for her breathing which was rapid and shallow. Every second was agony as the silence continued. Deeks bit his lip, and finally decided to be the one to break the silence.

“Kens?” He asked quietly, nervousness evident in his voice. “You’re...uh…freaking me out here.”

Kensi got up from the table, blowing out the candles that had been put out to set the mood and
starting pacing, running her hands through her hair. “That’s because I’m a bit freaked out myself.”

Why?” Deeks asked, frowning and putting the ring down on the table.

“Because…”Kensi started to give a reason but stopped, licking her lips. She stopped her pacing and looked down in contemplation. Deeks just stood there, waiting. Finally, she looked up at him, with tears in her eyes.

“I’m scared that I’ll lose you, and that everything we’ve shared will be gone.” Her voice was shaky, and Deeks walked over to her, pulling her into his strong arms.

“Kens…”He whispered into her ear. “You’re not going to lose me. How many times have I told you this?”

Kensi stepped back, her hands gripped on his arms. “Marty, if we do this…you need to take extra care of yourself.”

“And you know I will.” He smiled, locking his fingers gently into her hair. “I know we’re taking a big risk here, but we’ve been through so much together over the years. And I can’t imagine my life without you anymore. I can’t imagine coming home without seeing you here. And I’d rather have stupid arguments with you about who is doing the dishes or being socked on the shoulder for something idiotic I said for the rest of my life than to go on without you. And I know you feel the same way.”

“So Kensi, I ask you again…will you marry me?”

Kensi couldn’t contain the tears anymore. She choked out a sob, managing the fullest smile she could give him and nodded emphatically.

As Deeks slid the ring onto her finger, every doubt vanished from her mind.
msdubstep: (abby caf-pow)
Hey everyone ^^ It's been a long time since I've posted but I've been spending more time here recently than I have in the last couple of months, and I thought "Wow, I'd better post, this journal is looking pretty dead..." LOL.

So I'm officially retaking my GED test in October. I think I'll do a lot better but I need to remember to keep up better on my studies. Procrastination, to say the least, is a weakness. I think that's kind of what screwed me last time.

Not looking forward to my yearly eval at work. I thought I would have had a different job by now, but it's funny how things work. Transportation is constantly an issue since I don't have a car yet. But I am still thankful that I have it. That being said, I really need to find a job closer to where I live. ^^;

Also, in fandom news, I think I'm going to try and get into Supernatural. I see so many people talk about it, and I decided to see what it was about. I watched this recap video on YouTube and it looks interesting. I've watched like one episode and then I never watched it again. I don't know why. But if I do watch it when it comes back, I'll let you know how I think of it.

I guess that's it for now! Just popping my head in, but now it's time to crash. Night night, lovelies.
msdubstep: (eric grin)
Hey everyone. So this month has bee really good so far. I've gotten more hours and a ton of compliments at work. I don't let it go to my head though. I really don't deserve it cause I just do what I normally do but hey....great :D

Last week a friend of mine and I went to a ball game and a ton of her family were there too. I loved meeting them. They treated me really nice and I wouldn't mind hanging with them again. I got a sunburn, just a bit. But it's turned into a nice tan. So I no longer look as pasty as a Munster. Yay.

Then there was a concert after the game but we only got to see the first act. They were okay. I had never even heard of them so I didn't really get into it but they did a good job in hyping up the crowd. KJ 52 was his name. This is one of his songs here

Then tomorrow after church if things go well with the weather, our church is having a picnic at the park. We had to postpone it because of snow in May. Yes, you read that correctly. Snow. I'm excited for tomorrow though.

And then later on this month (which I so need to get ready for) is an awards banquet for Special Olympics. A few friends from church is going and they've invited me even though I don't compete. I think it should be fun.

I think that's about it <3 Hope you all have a great week.

ETA: I had a Joan icon before that was really pretty but sad looking. Didn't really make sense for this entry, LOL!
msdubstep: (nell hoodie)
I suck at posting, I'm sorry :( I'm about to watch my recording of Dr. Who and go to bed but I want to share this. It's got a copious amount of language, but I had to see it seeing as the whole cast was talking about it on Twitter, and couldn't help but laugh.

That is all.

ETA: Checked Twitter just now and she retweeted me! <3

OK, I'm going for real now.
msdubstep: (gibbs)
So I have discovered a new fandom and I'm really getting hooked so far: Doctor Who. I know I'm totally late since it's such an old and long ongoing show, but it's really great! I've watched before, but never really gotten into it like I have now. My mom has been a huge fan of it since she was a kid, and she watches it every Saturday on BBC America. She also recently got my best friend Angela hooked on it. Matt Smith is a brilliant actor and I am really liking the new companion, Clara. She's so mysterious but she really is lovely. I'm getting ready to watch the new episode on DVR before bed. I'll post my thoughts on it tomorrow or Monday.

Also, I just got through making some sugar cookies for bible study tomorrow. Everyone signs up for a week that they bring treats and today is my week. (after I forgot last week...d'oh!) They are slightly over done but I also bought a cheese, pepperoni and cracker tray for in case people don't like the cookies. I really need to practice baking more. ^^; I love it even though I'm rubbish.

That's all for now, ciao bellas. ^^
msdubstep: (joan 1)
Today was a nice day. Hung out with some friends from church. We went to Taco Bell and then went to my friend Tammy's house and listened to music, played on her trampoline and made cheese dip for later on in bible study. My friend who got in the car wreck is doing better. He won't be getting out the hospital til the end of the week, though. It rained a bit, but the midwest needs it.

I realized something today though.

Throughout my life, I have hated offending people. I have said the wrong things with the right intention and it's pissed people off. I've tried to be more tactful with my words and my opinions, but still, I always manage to offend someone, directly or in general.

As a Christian and Democrat, there's always going to be an opposition to what I believe. But today, I have realized that it shouldn't bother me so much what people think.

And you know why?

Because in the end...opinions are like butts. We all have them and most of them stink. They mean nothing unless we treat each other with respect. They will be ignored if we say what we believe with hatred. And I hope that I never come across as hateful because that means I might as well have been talking out my butt.

*gets off soapbox*

Just a thought. Thanks for reading.
msdubstep: (pic#)
Soo...this weekend has been and will be interesting. I woke up and then my friend called and told me that one of the guys that go to my church has been in a car accident :( His lung is punctured and he has cracked ribs. He will be okay, though. I still feel sad for him. He's a nice guy. A bunch of us are going to see him tomorrow. Then we might go over to another person's house to hang out and have lunch. We'll just have to see where it goes. Today I went to the store and got a new mic and a movie called Fireproof. I've seen it before, and it's really good. It's a movie about this fireman who is struggling to save his marriage. It sort of got me all emotional last time I saw it though...I'll make sure I'll find some tissues. I'm a bit irritated. I've been waiting for the state of Missouri to send me my authorization letter to take my GED again. It's been two months now, I believe. I really want to get on with my life, dang it! If the letter doesn't come this week, I'm going to call and see who I need to chew out talk to so I can get it. Oh! And I found something on LJ last's freakin' awesome. Starships, a Multi-Fandom space vid *Goes to watch yet again*
msdubstep: (Default)
This is the third week I have been sick but I am getting over it thanks to this nasty tasting but very effective medicine I found called Nature Fusion by Vicks. It's great stuff, it's helped my congestion and my coughs aren't so bad. My boss commented on how bad I sounded and my friends and family have advised me to take care of myself and stay home since I've gotten worse since I've first gotten sick. I'm going to go back to work tommorow and hopefully I will feel better. I can't stay home forever.

I don't have insurance, and my discount through my local hospital expired so I have to get that renewed on the 30th. (That day, I'm also going to register to take my GED again.) I have had to self medicate basically. It sucks but I have no choice til I can find insurance I can afford.

I feel...odd for missing so much work but I realize taking care of myself is important. I wanted to be there so bad today. I'm already tight on funds as is.

I guess that's all for this post.
msdubstep: (eric)
I am very sick today. And this worries me because I don't want to have this at work, and also tommorow after church I'm planning going with a couple of people to a nursing home to visit. And I am sure that there are people there who have weakened immune systems and I don't want to give this to them. I don't want to end up cancelling either because this is something I really enjoy doing. A lot of those people in nursing homes get little to no visitors and they light up when they see us. And they have all been so nice. It would suck to have to stay home and miss that. I'll see how I feel tommorow, but I think at this point I might end up going home right after church. It kind of bums me out. But then again, with all the people that are sick currently, I was bound to get it.

The good thing is last night I went out with a couple of my closest friends to Applebee's and it was really fun. The two friends haven't really gotten a chance to hang out in person so I wanted to bring all of us together. It was a great time and I'm looking forward to the time when I will be able to do this again.

I am not sure whether to go to bed or stay up til around 9. I don't want to mess up my schedule but I am so tired...yeah I'll stay up just a bit longer.

Anyway, just a short update. Hope you all had a lovely new year. :)
msdubstep: (Default)

[community profile] ncis_verse ncis_verse is a challenge community. We play games, do puzzles, make graphics, write fan fic or just press our luck, whatever our lovely mods think up for us! It's a fun place. Case 7 just started on New Year's day. Come join us, and tell them [personal profile] msdubstep sent ya. ;)
msdubstep: (Default)
Title: The Weight of Partnership
Rating: K
Writing: whiteink
Graphics: msdubstep

The Weight of Partnership )
msdubstep: (Default)
Okay so in 2 days I am finally taking my GED test. I dropped out in 2004 when I was 18 and now I'm finally getting my life back together. I'm nervous about the math portion because that's my weakest subject but I am no longer having an near heart attack about it. I prayed that the Lord would take my worries away and it's beginning to work. So I am just mentally preparing myself and I think I have a better chance of passing than I did 2 months ago so my heart is at peace. That being said, I am really hoping that they give me the math portion first to get it the heck out of my way! After that, I think it's about 3 weeks of waiting to see if I passed or failed. So this week I'm gonna be preparing like mad...getting my paper work together, reviewing everything I've studied and getting a lot of sleep. I'm nervous but I'm excited. I really need to get this out of the way because I know I am called for something greater than what I'm doing now.

Also, after the test i can relax and get caught up on my fanfics. :D

Ta ta for now. :)

(x-posted at livejournal: )
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